Monday, July 31, 2006

THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: music that is acceptable and that also rules


so the sensacist is mainly into electronica these days. i used to hate electronica but then i realized that it was the most pleasing combination of stimulation for my robot brain and movement for my ethnic hips.

anyway, the knife's new album, silent shout is the shit. i may even like it better than the junior boys, its definitely more complex and although it has pop elements, its a better indication of the future of electronica i.e. less derivative, more original.

think kraftwerk and new order take mushrooms in the swedish countryside and then mindfuck abba.

discover it for yourself people!
UPDATE: Boy George to pick up trash in Aug. heat


holy shit. from yahoo news:

NEW YORK - Boy George will perform his court-ordered community service by picking up trash on city streets in the August heat, a sanitation spokesman said.

The one-time Culture Club singer will be issued a shovel, broom, plastic bags and gloves when he reports for five days of work on Aug. 14, department spokesman Vito Turso said.

"This is the epitome of community service," Turso told the Daily News for Monday editions. "It's not like he's going to be working in an air-conditioned office."

i mean, he is clearly going to die right? i mean not only is he old and fat but the effects of 30 years of cocaine abuse have probably not done wonders for his internal organs. that being said, its still funny as shit! (don't do drugs, kids!!)

Friday, July 28, 2006

Marc Bolan and David Bowie

happy friday from two of the gods in the sensacism pantheon. two true andro androids and how fucking hot are blowie's sunglasses??
Um...


yeah, its what you think it is.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

I AIN'T SAYING NOTHING





ok maybe I am.
OY

now i never was that big of a babs fan. a. because i am not actually a homosexual and b. because my father is a self-hating jew and would have frowned upon it but goddamn she is looking rough these days. i mean she was never a beauty but she did have that semetic charm and jewish girls are freaks in the bedroom.
DAVID HASSELHOFF VIDEO TRIBUTE

so david hasselhoff has been in the news a lot lately for wife-beating, public drunkeness etc. and in all the hoopla, everyone has forgotten what a massive talent this man truly is. i mean, i count knight rider and baywatch as two of my favorite shows of all time FOR REAL. but it wasn't until my good friend tbird blessed me many years ago with the greatest present of all time, a david hasselhoff import cd from germany, that i discovered his true talent. FEAST.
Looking For Freedom - David Hasselhoff

UNREAL.
David Hasselhoff - Wings Of Tenderness

unbelievable

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

ANYONE WANT TO GO TO HOTT 22 THIS WEEKEND??



from nytimes:

Twist on a Famous Formula: A Severed Hand in a Topless Dancer’s Jar

some excerpts:

SOUTH PLAINFIELD, N.J., July 25 — A scrawled note on the door read: “No!!! comment. Just stop knocking. You want a story read a book.”

But who could beat the story of the house in this middle-class town, where the police say an exotic dancer at a nude juice bar had a severed hand, nicknamed Freddy, preserved in formaldehyde, and six human skulls?

The police said it was unclear where the body parts had come from, but that did not deter them from charging the dancer, Linda E. Kay, 31 — who works at Hott 22, a strip club in Union — with unlawful disposition of human remains.

Andrea Leipow, 25, an aspiring model, said she had lived at the house for a brief time, ending in April. She said that Ms. Kay had told her that a medical student who was a fan of Ms. Kay’s dancing had given the hand to her as a gift.

Ms. Leipow said that residents of the house had nicknamed it “Lefty” or “Freddy” or, simply, “the Hand.”

She said that the house’s residents scared her, so she left. “They had tons of weapons,” she said. “They had a medieval mace, a shotgun, they had another sawed-off shotgun, pistols, knives.”

“She’s kind of an artistic person, with her own sense of aesthetics,” he [Ira Weiner, a lawyer for the club (JEW)] said. “But she’s harmless. You know, what she collected was not a manifestation of her being vicious, it’s just simply what she thought was cool or had some artistic merits.”(hmm i consider myself to be somewhat of an artistic person, i believe people who collect human remains and violent weapons are known as "psychopaths")

The police arrested a second exotic dancer who lived in the house, Polina V. Nikulina, 26. She was charged on Friday with failing to appear in court on a weapons charge (naturally a russian is also involved.)

God i love Jersey. Maybe she can get a job at the new classy Atlantic City.
Looking Towards the New Order


thanks sebastopol.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Laura Nyro - Poverty Train

the sensacist is sort of a hippie at heart and no one says urban hippie like one of the few gods i worship in my life and that is laura nyro. she basically taught me everything i know about life. do some research on her people and listen to her music. she will change you too.
RUSSIAN PHRASE OF THE DAY

ты тварь собачья


twan says: bitches' most disgusting piece of trash
mish says: dog-like maggot
the sensacist says: RAD!!!
ITS GETTING HARD TO BE A DRUG ADDICT



kids, please don't do drugs. even if you went to expensive ivy league universities that encouraged "experimentation" please be careful because that shit is bad for your brain steez. i mean, moderation, kk? anyways...from boingboing.net:

Meth Gun For Drug Detection

The "meth gun" looks similar to a radar gun but it's made to help police find trace amounts of dope. According to CDEX Inc., the $10,000 device is the first portable, handheld system that uses ultraviolet light to scan surfaces (most likely at close range).

"We see this as an investigative aid," Foster said. "If I had been ingesting cocaine and then wiped it off, this unit would be able to identify the cocaine on that table or on my clothes..."

The devices being field-tested will test only for meth, but the mass-produced devices will test for meth, cocaine, marijuana, heroin and peroxide-based explosives — which are similar chemically to meth, company officials said.

HOLY SHIT.

in related news, remember what she used to look like?:

Monday, July 24, 2006

So..

the sensacist had a colorful weekend. from hardcore gay rap to public indiscretions to the coining of a new and brilliant term, BUTT LUSH, by the lovely lipstick dipshitz, it was one for the mental catalogues.

however, i am feeling pretty dazed today and have thus been a little slow with my sensacing. but, this was definitely my favorite news story of the weekend, and definitely the most important considering that shit like the earth melting and like world war trois coming soon to a strip mall near you, is like so over.

New Miss Universe is crowned, then faints


some excerpts:

LOS ANGELES - An 18-year-old from Puerto Rico who hopes to someday star in U.S. and Latin American films was crowned Sunday night as Miss Universe 2006. Zuleyka Rivera Mendoza shared a nervous emotional hug with first runner-up, Kurara Chibana of Japan, moments before the winner was announced, then clasped her hands to her mouth in amazement as her name was called.

She beamed as the crown was placed on her head but briefly fainted after a post-pageant news conference. She quickly recovered after being given liquids, said Miss Universe spokeswoman Esther Swan.

Rivera, who was wearing a dress made entirely of metal chains, had been standing under hot stage lights for some time when she began to topple over. Someone caught her as she fell.

a dress made entirely of metal chains??? holy shit. only my freakin' ricans oh and like sly stone probs would wear that shit:



P.S. also from article: several of the contestants sported costumes featuring colorful native dress, including feathers, sequins, fur, massive headpieces and, in the case of Miss Japan, a Samurai sword.

wait what native dress features sequins???, are my dreams of an entirely gay country coming to fruition, shit, maybe it was just italy.
The Jackson 5- Ain't Nothin Like The Real Thing

i was feeling a bit depressed today so i did what every normal human being does and searched for jackson 5 videos on youtube and found this gem. enjoy.

Friday, July 21, 2006

The Knife - Heartbeats

new fave, thanks twan. although you know how i feel about skaters.
я люблю америку! россия - говно

Thursday, July 20, 2006

THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: COCAINE AND PLASTIC SURGERY DO A BODY GOOD

BEFORE:


AFTER:
SOS BAND - Just Be Good to Me

ok so the sound quality isn't stunning but holy fuck do i love this band and can someone please buy me roland 808 or 909 and that fucking spandex outfit she is wearing???
HOLY FUCKING SHIT! I AM DECLARING TODAY AN OFFICIAL HOLIDAY


people this is the news i have been waiting for my whole life. apparently dakota fanning is getting closer to her future career as a rough fucked bukkake porn slut. some excerpts (and no people i do not think child rape is funny, goddamn!):

ALL SHOOK UP OVER DAKOTA'S HOUNDDOG

Cute-as-a-button child star Dakota Fanning, who turned 12 in February, is venturing into sexually disturbing territory in a movie being filmed in North Carolina. The screenplay for "Hounddog" - a dark story of abuse, violence and Elvis Presley adulation in the rural South, written and directed by Deborah Kampmeier - calls for Fanning's character to be raped in one explicit scene and to appear naked or clad only in "underpants" in several other horrifying moments.

"The two taboos in Hollywood are child abuse and the killing of animals," a source close to the situation told me. "In this movie, both things happen."

"The subject matter is very tough," Robins told me, "but I was attracted to it because in the end it's a story about human understanding, about a little girl who's dealt a very bad deck of cards, but finds solace in the music of Elvis and survives."

"It's not just the rape scene - the whole story is challenging Dakota as an actress," Fanning's longtime agent, Osbrink, told me. "And I've never been so proud of her in my life. I've seen the dailies, and in every scene she gets better and better." (NYDN)

god do i love this bitch. i mean is there really a greater thespian who ever lived? i can't wait to see her venereal ass in 10 years when i am driving down the sunset strip documenting the decline.
THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: SHOES THAT ARE TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE FOR URBAN WEAR


ok people, now i know these shits are comfortable. the sensacist has worn them before when i was AT THE BOTTOM OF THE FUCKING GRAND CANYON AFTER I HIKED INTO THE MOTHERFUCKER.

anyway, anyone seen wearing these on the streets of new york should recieve a UISNTNP, "ugly is not the new pretty" ticket. there are plenty of comfortable shoes out there, please, please do not assault my eyes when i am just trying to get on the fucking f train and be a robotron for 8 hours with your fucking nasty plastic feet that probably have subway platform herpes breeding in them all because you forgot you weren't on a fucking boat.

ANYWAY:

now a couple of years back, when i was in college, some people used to wear these because they were supposed to be "cool." this was unacceptable but slightly excusable because everyone was oversexed, underfed and stoned all the time. bad decisions can result. however, years later, i am still seeing these on the feet of tooltrons in this city. WHAT IS THE DEAL PEOPLE? these are MEN'S BALLET SLIPPERS made for the tender dance of dry homosexual ass raping known as wrestling. these are not urban footwear, please note and evolve.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

DON'T DO DRUGS KIDS



now i never liked carson daly but everyone in high school had like a huge boner for him when he was hosting trl and shit but i always thought he was disgusting and should be like permanently banished to the university of arizona or another one of those tooltron places.

anyway, it seems like our little friend has cultivated a taste for disco and i ain't talking about the music, people.

sick.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Um...



its kinda not even funny anymore.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

THIS RULES!!!


from boingbong.net:

this pringles can packed with "crack cookies" was apparently confiscated during a recent drug bust in austin, texas.

kevin ray landry, 35, was taken into custody for providing an alias when officers requested that he identify himself. landry was found to be in possession of approximately 10 grams of crack cocaine at the time of his arrest. narcotic conspiracy personnel subsequently executed a search warrant on landry’s vehicle resulting in the additional seizure of 17 cookies of crack cocaine.

shit, i always wondered why i could never stop eating fucking pringles. they don't really taste that good and there was always that light white dusting....hmm.

THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: Models of the New Order


so last night the gays and i assembled to watch the first episode of Project Runway 3. naturally champagne was involved, gaysia matty lost it and everything eventually disintegrated into a dance party. but, some very intriguing things were noted before i ended up screaming about the weather, bladerunner, the decline of western civilization and beating gaysia with yellow rubber dishwashing gloves.

ANYWAY, one of the models for this season kind of blew my mind because although she was tall enough and had very strong black ethnic features, she was also really built, like i'm talking this girl had gunz. you can't see so well in this picture, i will try and find more and i didn't find her particulary attractive but she was striking and it got me to thinking about the concept of models which i think about a lot anyway.

fashion is a taste and obviously $$$ based industry so the models are naturally going to reflect specific tastes and how certain people percieve how the clothes should fit so the clothes will sell. there are billions of people in the world so naturally some people are going to fit into each specifically defined ideal. toothpick, "hangar" models are all the rage now but i am wondering if things are going to shift, i wonder if we will see more models like this girl. in any case, it is potentially exciting and ripe for interpretation on many levels.

wow i just totally fagged out. don't you love me?

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

THE SENSACIST COMMENTS ON ISRAEL AND PALESTINE


seabass just shared some pictures of a funeral in gaza for some of the victims of the recent israeli air strike and some very, very graphic pictures of people wounded by said airstrikes. the victims being buried included 9 members of a single family with 7 children between the ages of 7 and 18. i can't post the pictures because i might get sued but this is very upsetting. the sensacist jokes around a lot but people this is not right. i am obviously not going to sum up the "israeli-palestinean conflict" right now, you'd have to get me a little sauced for that but this "conflict" runs to the very, very core of what it means to be a human being and is senseless, fucking juvenile and sad.

that being said, i am an issuing a big fuck you to israel. i fucking hate israel. i am not like mega down with palestine or anything, i basically am issuing a big fuck you to all of that shit but israel gets a special fuck you for thinking it is ok to kill like 300 people over a missing soldier. i'm sorry, i said it, but they need to fucking check themselves and lets be honest, the real homeland of the jews is new york city and los angeles,california so these people just need to suck each other sideways and chill FOR REAL.
SO...

everyone knows scandinavian people are freaks. they love fucking and porn and nasty shit and are basically my kind of people. but i'm sorry this shit is just weird.


pee & poo dolls duo pack
emma megitt
(SCANDINAVIAN DETAILS)
THE SENSACIST COMMENTS ON SEX AND SEXUALITY



so people, lately i have been thinking a lot about sex and sexuality. actually this a lie because i am always thinking about sex and sexuality. the point is that things are shifting a lot and we are entering into a new age in which certain categories are beginning to lose their meaning.

sure, some people like fucking dudes and some people like doing bitches and vice versa but everything is becoming more fluid, and also more confusing and i think this is totally rad.

but, it is also dangerous because in many ways the act of sex is becoming almost completely separated from one's own sexuality so basically you never know who you are fucking so be safe people! but also like great andro androids of the past like my god and savior david bowie, do not be afraid to express your unique fornicatory desires 'cause as the sensacists say, if its hot and if its going around DO IT!

oh and btw, straight men will be obsolete in a few years so prepare yourselves.
THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: God War is Gay!!! (and so are italians...VIVE LA FRANCE!!!)



seabass sent me this picture from a series entitled "italians in iraq/afghanistan" and all i can say is you know how i feel about italians. also please do not be offended by my frequent use of homosexual slurs because i am basically a gay man in a woman's body so this is allowed. that being said, FAGS!!!!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

RUSSIAN WORD OF THE DAY

ok, its a phrase again.

*zhopni sex*

meaning: anal sex!!!



r.i.p. jermaine stewart, you are right, we don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time, we have to take our clothes off to have a great time and also to die of aids. damn. i love you. rip.
THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: World Cup Recap a.k.a. Who I Need to Do



so everyone knows what happened in the world cup and you people know how i feel about italians so i am not going to even comment on that. what is really important is that i found some new dudes who i need to do! i know everyone hates zidane now but i still want to do him hyper-badly! i'm here for you baby! or if not i'll take this one:



just how i like 'em: young, dumb and full of cum!
THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: When Black People Do Cocaine

god this rules.
SOS BAND borrowed love

thank you lipstick dipshitz! where the fuck can i get a fucking pink duster?
Billy Ocean - Caribbean Queen

simply awesome!

Monday, July 10, 2006

SO...

i got to thinking and i decided that "sand nigger" is definitely my favorite racial slur of all time. i love it because it shows how truly stupid people are and that even with the intense energy generated by bigotry, creativity is still lost. what about mesopotamian kike or like holy koran diploid?

anyway, i did a little google search for "sand nigger" and found the incredible picture below. i don't really have words and you probably know what i am going to say but even with that ICEC (i can't even comment.)

RUSSIAN WORD OF THE DAY

ok today its a phrase:

*kokainskeye shluhi*

meaning:

COKE SLUTZ!!!
THE SENSACIST PRESENTS: MUSIC THAT IS ACCEPTABLE AND THAT ALSO RULES


so people, i know i talk a lot about the decline of western civilization and after watching two episodes of the latest simple life last night there is little doubt in my mind. BUT, the sensacist has been resurrected from the depths of despair by a glimpse of the future. i am talking, people, about the junior boys' latest album, "so this is goodbye."

pure and simple, this album is a masterpiece, totally rules and is also really important. i have been listening to it pretty much non-stop for the last week or so in many different environments including while driving to philadelphia on the jersey turnpike which was especially perfect because it fits incredibly into that post-post-post cultural wasteland.

anyway, i don't really like describing music because any truly brilliant sonic experience is open for personal interpretation and also genrefying is so over (LBH: LETS BE HONEST) but believe me when i say that in a few years people will look back upon this album as the marker of a new sound, a new feeling and a new order.

discover it for yourself.

Friday, July 07, 2006

THE WHO GIVES A HOLY FUCKTRON HEADLINE OF THE DAY:



Crow believed to be oldest in world dies

some excerpts:

EARSVILLE, N.Y. - There's no way to prove Tata was the world's oldest crow when he died Sunday at age 59. But an expert on crows says it's possible.

Tata's tale began in 1947 when a thunderstorm blew the fledgling out of his nest in a Long Island cemetery, a mishap that likely led to his long life. Injured and unable to fly, the bird was scooped up by a cemetery caretaker and brought to a local family with a reputation for taking care of animals, Tata's most recent owner, Kristine Flones, told the Daily Freeman of Kingston.

"When you came around him, his energy was very beautiful," she told the newspaper. "It was as if he were exuding or giving off a loving energy." (YAHOO NEWS)

actually tata kinda rules. i hope he rests in pieces and chills with this dude:

IS KIM JONG II A HIPSTER???



naw. just a p-i-m-p.

ICEC: I CAN'T EVEN COMMENT



like, oh my god.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

VAGUE HEADLINE OF THE DAY

Mystery Object Found in Supernova's Heart

some excerpts:

embedded in the heart of a supernova remnant 10,000 light-years away is a stellar object the likes of which astronomers have never seen before in our galaxy.

at first glance, the object looks like a densely packed stellar corpse known as a neutron star surrounded by a bubble of ejected stellar material, exactly what would be expected in the wake of a supernova explosion (YAHOO NEWS).

i don't know why, but this really turns me on.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

I AM IN A BAD MOOD

OK. so yesterday some 25-year old skeezer who is friends with one of my friends and dresses like an 8-year old boy from tallahassee called me a hipster as i entered a building on the lower east side.

so fucking what? i fucking admit it. i'm a hipster, the biggest hipster who ever lived, i invented the motherfucking word hipster. now suck me sideways, buy me a pack of parliament lights and evolve.

You know who's creepy?



this guy. you know he is probably a major cokehead and does sick shit like cum into womens' shoes. also, clearly a jew.
THE OH SHIT HEADLINE OF THE DAY

Afghans burn more than 40 tons of drugs

Some excerpts:

KABUL, Afghanistan - Afghan officials destroyed more than 40 tons of confiscated narcotics worth an estimated $500 million on Wednesday in a giant bonfire on the outskirts of Kabul.

The drugs that were burned included 4.1 tons of heroin, 12 tons of opium, and 24 tons of hashish confiscated over the last year. Another 24 tons of chemical ingredients used to make illegal drugs was also destroyed.

It is the third time that the government has staged an event this year to destroy confiscated drugs and alcohol. Last month, 1.5 tons of drugs and 7,000 liters of alcohol were destroyed. More than 20 tons of chemical ingredients were destroyed in May (YAHOO NEWS).

umm. 500 million dollars???? couldn't they have done something better with these drugs like sell them and give me a little chunk of change? the war on drugs is so gay but this dude's outfit is so hipster or terrorist!:

AFTER THE HOLIDAZE



so the sensacist splashed it hard this weekend and by hard i mean belly of the beast, people. i am talking meatpackers, tribecz, you name it, i was disgusted by it. on monday i had a date with a lovely young gentleman who i met at a birthday dinner, actually he is kind of an asshole and a total pony fiend but that is neither here nor there. anyway, we started with cocktails at the luscious hotel gansevoort (pictured above) and let me tell you this place is trash. from the outside it looks as if it was designed by some half blind retarded 4 year old miami beach low rent frank gehry. inside was less than impressive, the people were not particulary attractive, the service could have been better but the view from the roof is stunning and after 3 cocktails in 20 minutes i was up for anything. that anything was the illustrious soho house located across the street! i can't tell you much about my experience here except for the fact that i was trashed and asked our homosexual waiter if he had chopsticks that i could eat my summer salad with "goats" not goat, people, "goats cheese". trash.

anyway, after the roof, we retired to the club room where i drank chivas and looked bored. this lasted for god knows how long, at this point i had lost track of time and came to on our way to APT which was shockingly boring and filled with 19 year olds and people you know where i am going with this: EVERYTHING IS OVER...everything is lame. what is real anymore? i can't tell you but i can tell you that nyc is pretty much dunzo so either remake it in your image as i might do in about 15-20 years or run screaming.

Monday, July 03, 2006

THE INTERNET IS FOR FREAKS

you people know how much i love the internet. i mean i love chatting with my friends on instant messenger, surfing different sites, discovering weird shit and generally having a rad time! but seriously there are some serious freaks out there and these people need to be taken care of. look at this message i got on friendster from "james" a 41 year old male from tallahassee (figures):

my ur attractive, if i am right ur a male living as
female? find u very attractive, u single? would enjoy
getting to know u.


i am not sure how to feel about this. yes i might be fairly androgynous sometimes especially with my short hair but people do i look like a dude? is this motherfucker fucking with me? i am having a personal crises. who is this urod and how do i report him to the disgust authorities?